Parenting By Grace

Stu and Ruth Ann Batstone testify to the Gospel by sharing their experiences with parenting, and drawing parents to see themselves as sinners in need of God’s power to love their children.  Saturday we asked them to lead a seminar on parenting, and invited about 40 couples (80 people) to come and participate.  The cloudy morning and the Saturday market bustle meant that by 10:30 only a half dozen had arrived for the 9 am meeting . . . And I wondered if we were making a big mistake.  But within the next half hour everyone congregated and I counted 86 participants!  It was one of the most diverse groups we’ve ever had together for Biblical teaching—church leaders from five denominations were present, as well as headmasters or senior teaching staff from 6 schools, another contingent of people associated with WHM extension work, and a strong showing from the health center.  I enjoyed seeing some very young couples, whom I have known since they were younger than my kids are now . . . All the way up to graying elders.  And God surprised us by drawing in two of the men whose repentance (conversion?) we have been praying for for years.  Children are essential, the goal of every family is to have many of them, successful children who care for their elders.  So this was a hot topic.

We began the day by asking two groups of four volunteers to act out a typical household morning, and evening, to demonstrate parent/child relationships.  Improvisational drama is a strong point of this culture—the skits were dramatic and captivated interest as they acted out their heart-felt issues: parents unable to provide school fees for their children, not enough food to go around, lack of respect from the children, and on and on, with lots of accusation and argument.  In the discussion that followed various people gave their ideas about the main problems and then we probed:  does that happen in your places?  Why?  Some of the older men blamed laziness, lack of hard work by parents.  But one of the younger pastors gave me a lot of compassion and insight when he described how shaming and stressful it is as a parent when your child comes home saying that he needs a few shillings for something at school, and you can’t provide it.  The reaction is to bluster and blame, to send the child away with condemnation or excuses, and eventually to turn to alcohol or begin absent as a way to escape that painful reality.  

Then Stu and Ruth Ann each gave two talks, aimed at probing parental hearts.  This was not a “how-to” set of lectures, not a “fix-your-children” approach.  Instead they tried to show parents that our call is to love our children, to teach and guide them, to not provoke or exasperate them, to deal with them as God deals with us.  And we fail daily, more than daily, hundreds and thousands of times a year.  But the good news is that God uses broken families full of sinners to bring His Kingdom into this world, and He forgives and changes us.  They used the stories of the Isaac/Rebecca, Jacob/Esau conflicts, and of Hannah’s heart-wrenching prayer, to really connect with families here.  Our homework was to ask our children “how do you wish God would change me?”  That’s a dangerous question.  One of the most interesting parts of the day:  Scott ran home to get something and decided to ask our kids that while he was there.  Then he came back and gave his testimony, describing the four things Luke immediately said, which were all very true though hard to hear about anger, unfairness, putting work before family.  Since people know us very well, they were very engaged with his honesty.  In this culture, such a conversation is pretty hard to imagine.  So we ended and prayed and wondered what was happening around the family fires last night.  Maybe the first seeds of parental awakening to a different way of relating to their children . . . Maybe the seeds of a hunger for Jesus in our need.  

Mundri and Lui, a Visit to Southern Sudan

Here are some impressions of Southern Sudan, if one is even allowed to have impressions in only three days of travel  . . . A vast, green, flooded, flat, forested, harsh, muddy land (in the rainy season, which is peaking now) dotted with people of determination, history, hope.

Seven missionaries from our team flew from Bundibugyo to Arua (Uganda, for customs) then to Mundri, in Western Equatoria, Sudan.  We were hosted by veteran missionaries David and Heather Sharland and the Episcopal Church of Sudan.  The Sharlands have been in Africa about twenty years and in this part of Sudan the last 8, and in spite of some harrowing close calls with bandits and bombs they have managed to develop close ties with their Anglican church counterparts, and poured their passions into agriculture and village health.  Michael and Scott met them on their first trip to Sudan almost a year ago, and Michael has been in touch with David over the months.  The Sharlands work in Lui, which is 25 km east of Mundri.  They asked the Massos to consider Mundri as a potential WHM site.  The ECS has been in Mundri almost 90 years, established under a slave trading tree by a Dr. Fraser who then went on to build some amazingly solid (in every sense of the word) schools and a hospital in Lui.

A few adventures, and then the summary.  Adventures first:  to reach Mundri town from the airstrip requires crossing the Yei river, which at this point in the rainy season is about fifty yards of fast-flowing brown water and debris.  The bridge was blown up during the war, so groups of 15 or 20 people pile into an old wooden row boat that is tied to a rope, and a very strong man then pulls you hand over hand across the flooded waters.  We were received royally, politely.  There is a dignity and pride that people have not lost in the war.  They are looking for help and partnership but they have their own sense of mission as a church to rebuild their country.  Lots of tea and talk in a small mud-walled kitbbi, then a walk through the local school, which was not much more than crumbling mud walls and a few pole benches.  The cathedral, however, is very impressive.  At this point in the tour the government official arrived with his ivory stick and suit, and announced that the river had reached the highest flood stage since 1983 (the beginning of the current north-south conflict, so a definite point of reference in everyone’s mind) and we would not be permitted to cross back over that night.  This was a bit upsetting to our host David whose wife and other friends in Lui were expecting us . . . And to us, since the car and our back-packs were on the other side of the river . . . But we saw God’s hand giving us more time in Mundri.  We ended up in a guest house consisting of a dozen or so tukuls, the Sudanese version of a small square hut with a thatch roof.  Our church hosts fed us, then we all sat outside in chairs in the dark and asked questions about peoples’ life stories, culture, marriage, land, crops.  Stranded by floods in a small town, a dot on the vast map of Sudan, but with our team of friends and a very gracious church group.

The next morning we first learned to brush our teeth with a local stick when we saw everyone else doing so . . .and then walked around more of the town, clinic, schools.  It was a bit of history to see some of the “returnees” already settled temporarily in schools, and another 118 dropped off by the IOM (UN agency dealing with displaced people) that morning, after flying from Khartoum and being trucked to Lui.  Peace is growing, though no one knows for how long.  Those who fled the war are now coming back to resume their lives among those who stayed.  Both suffered.  

By mid day we headed back across the river, which had ebbed back down slightly, then bounced the rutted and puddled 25 km east of the river to Lui.  This town is smaller, but had more of the mission influence in the last century.  Again we met remarkable people, smiling and competent and determined, working with very little.  Again we sat and drank tea and ate rice and beans with church leaders, listening to their problems and dreams.  A highlight for me was to tour the Samaritan’s Purse hospital where people I’ve met worked under very strenuous conditions during the war.  We stayed in little mud tukuls again, and visited also the Sharland’s home for more fellowship.

Impressions:  much like Bundibugyo when we first came (no cell phones, no fridges, long roads, few varieties of goods) but in other ways much further ahead in terms of Christian impact and international aid attention.  The church is a much more pervasive institution and means of reaching the people with mercy ministries, and longs for that.  English is the medium of instruction and communication, a big plus for Americans.  WHM would be partnering with a wise mentoring missionary couple and some amazing Sudanese Christians, very appealing.  Because of Samaritan’s Purse’s legacy, the training schools, the supplies I saw, and the much lower population, I did not sense the medical needs being as great as those in Bundibugyo and I know they would be much more intense in other areas of Sudan.  But we came away thinking this would be a good place for WHM to start, particularly with the handful of schools already formed and functional whose teachers need encouragement and training.  The trip allows Michael to gather data and pray and form ideas to present to our board in the Fall.  Stay tuned!

Thanks from Ndyezika

He says “Thanks for your prayer.  Everything went well on my side.  At least I was able to finish very well.  Have a good day!”
Just wanted to pass that on.  We won’t know the official results for weeks, and he still has the oral and practical to go.

More thanks:  The Batstsones (Stu and Ruth Ann) and Donovan Graham arrived well this morning, looking fresh and clean and cheerful in spite of a very dare-devil skip-the-wet-spot half-runway landing . . .

Back Home

The Sudan travelers are all back home, and thanks to a slight decrement in rainfall we even landed here in Bundibugyo, with a dramatic splash.  More on the whole trip later but it was a fantastic opportunity and we are very positive about this direction for WHM. In a few hours Stu and Ruth Ann Batstone and Donovan Graham will also land . . . Hopefully just as smoothly.  Also many have replied about Ndyezika—he won’t know the outcome of his exams for weeks, possibly a couple of months.  Sorry there won’t be immediate feedback.  The next phase will be oral and practical exams in the capital on Aug 19 and 20.  THANKS.

Bundibugyo Travel Trials

Seven of our team members packed their daypacks for a 48 hour sojourn to southern Sudan yesterday (Michael & Karen Masso, Kevin Bartkovich, Kim Stampalia, Bethany Ferguson, Pat Abbott, & Jennifer). Heading for Mundri (a solid possibility for the site of WHM’s next Team to be launched) to assess the needs, scout out alliances, and even explore potential living situations. Michael managed to finagle a unique itinerary to southern Sudan, avoiding altogether a return to Entebbe which is usually necessary to clear Immigration. Instead, MAF agreed to fly from Bundibugyo directly to Arua (Uganda’s northernmost airstrip) where they would re-fuel and an Immigration officer would check passports there. A beautiful and efficient plan…which did not account for rain. Sunday saw a record rainfall for Bundibugyo. By Monday morning our little grass airstrip had standing water in several places. Last November, one of MAF’s Cessna 210s got stuck in the mud on the grass airstrip. With that memory vividly in mind, MAF radioed that they would land at the airstrip near Karugutu’s Semiliki Safari Lodge…two hours drive from our airstrip. So, our seven adventurers (plus the five Pillsburys, Michael’s sisters’ family) riding atop Michael’s pickup truck, traversed the Rwenzoris. They found two MAF planes waiting, one for the Sudan travelers and one for the Pillsbury family who headed back to Entebbe after their visit. Jennifer called from Arua to say that they cleared Immigration without a problem. So, as they say in the spy movies, our intrepid travelers are “going dark.” We’ll have no communication from them until they return Wednesday afternoon. Pray that we wouldn’t be in darkness (and wetness), but that the sun would shine so that our air field could dry up and allow them to land near home (and avoid that extra two hours of road travel) tomorrow.

The Spirit Moves, Sunday in Bundimulinga

A long and full church service today: most importantly, Chase Fletcher Gray was baptized, along with a dozen or so other babies and toddlers, and one newly-professing adult woman! But before we got to the main event, there were some very encouraging moments of lively worship and the spirit moving. The elders called all the children to the front for prayer as they have begun doing the first Sunday of every month (look for Jack and Julia in the crowd, and I mean CROWD of kids). Later a young man stood up to confess that he had taken a wife without proper permission from his elders . . . And though he loves her he wanted to be forgiven for going about it rashly. Another stood up to confess that he had been in conflict over school fees with the mission for a long time but God had finally brought about full forgiveness and reconciliation, and to affirm that Michael also stood up and hugged him. Those along with the newly converted woman and Charles Katajeera, who gave a testimony of God’s goodness to allow him to go back to school for a two year masters’ degree (after which he plans to return as deputy headmaster again at Christ School), were all called up front for special prayer, as you see above. It was an encouraging Sunday, so see God at work in hearts in real ways.

PS Don’t forget to scroll down and read about Ndyezika needing prayer . . . Many have already replied and we are grateful to know that his prayer support spans the oceans and reaches the heavens . . .

Wheelchair for Kabasunguzi, Intern Legagy

Two summers ago, Kabasunguzi Grace came into our team life as an emaciated little girl close to death. That summer interns Carol and Laura spent time with her at the hospital, reading books and bringing encouragement. Kim and her visiting aunt became involved too in her emergency transport to a referral hospital. After months of frustrating care and diagnostic difficulty, treatment for schistosomiasis of the brain seemed to arrest the progression of her disease, but she was left blind and crippled. Nevertheless, with good nutritional support and medicine she improved and finally went home from the hospital. We have continued to keep up our relationship, mostly because she’s one of the cheeriest people I know, with a sense of humor that even my limited Lubwisi allows me to enjoy. This summer I took our current crop of interns to visit her at home, and we left with the idea of the interns going in together to build or purchase her a wheel chair. Before they left they obtained one for her in Fort Portal and sent it back to Bundibugyo. Yesterday we went to deliver the new wheel chair, which will allow here to be moved around outside rather than lie on a bed in her little damp and dark mud house! And we bought a radio, so she can hear the news and music even though she can’t see. I wish all you interns could have heard her delighted laugh . . .but a picture will have to suffice. THANKS.

On Exams by Faith . . . .

We first met Ndyezika Edison when he was about 11. He was living in a tiny mud room with his mentally disturbed brother, orphaned and on his own. His father had long ago died, and when his mother remarried the new husband did not take Ndyezika in, as commonly happens. He had been befriended by the Herrons, and we sort of inherited the relationship. I have a picture of him our first Christmas (1993), sitting on our couch with a big smile because we had bought him used tennis shoes. He became a great friend to our children over the years as we sponsored him in school and generally looked out for his life. We’ve been with him through significant life events, and he with us. He entered Christ School’s inaugural class in 1999. Academics have always been a struggle, though he is a diligent student he probably has a learning disability of some sort that would have been diagnosed and treated in a better world. Here he has just put in plain hard work, repeating years of school until he could get it right. In all that he remained humble and hopeful, very popular with teachers in spite of his low grades, because of his great attitude. He became a Christian, and we have seen real spiritual growth. After graduating from Christ School we sponsored him in a training school for Laboratory Technicians. There he again struggled with the testing, repeating years of study. My kids love him so much they even convinced my mom to sponsor his last year of school when we were running out of resources and patience ourselves! Now he’s at the end of the school road (again), awaiting the final exams which will qualify him to work as a lab tech in Bundibugyo. He can do the work—he’s been working in our lab on vacations for several years, and does a great job. His ability to perform the tasks is clear, but he can’t get a government position and salary to to this work unless he passes the tests. And exams have been a life-long struggle for him.

Monday to Wednesday August 6-8, and Sunday/Monday August 19/20 Ndyezika will sit for the final qualifying exams for becoming a laboratory technician. The first three days are written tests administered at his school, the second two days are oral and practical exams at the national referral hospital in Kampala.

Would you please join us in praying for him??? We love this boy, and we believe he will be a solid part of the Kingdom of God in Bundibugyo, serving patients and loving God. Our parental hearts have watched him persevere through failure and continue to try. He has, as far as we know, consistently chosen the right path, caring for his widowed (again) mother and for his siblings, acting honorably towards a young woman he would like to marry if he can pass exams and get a job (he’s 25 now). Please implore God to give Ndyezika the ability to remember and write what he’s learned, to not panic, to have favor in the examiners’ eyes. Maybe others will pay bribes, maybe the whole system is corrupt, we don’t know. But we remember when Jonah had to take the University entrance exams twice, and by God’s grace he was allowed to pass the second time. Please pray that Ndyezika would not fail.

Lots of other important things are happening here. I am accompanying the Massos and some other team mates to Sudan the very days Ndyezika is testing in the coming week. We are setting up ministry opportunities for Stu and Ruth Ann Batstone and Donovan Graham, who will be with us for much of the rest of the month to engage people in issues of education, parenting, the Gospel, and grace! There is a major Kwejuna Project distribution a week from Monday. Scott is starting to work with Pat (hopefully) on a new program to increase outreach and education in villages related to HIV and AIDS. Christ School and RMS are in the final weeks of the term of school, with exams and projects and goodbyes pending. But nothing seems as crucial to my heart right now as Ndyezika passing exams.

Of Rain, Rainbows, and Pilgrimage

Rain, Rain on my face
It hasn’t stopped raining for days.
My world is aflood,
Slowly I become one with the mud.
-Jars of Clay

This song has been playing on our ipod and in my mind over and over this month, as day after day the sun is obscurred by heavy clouds, the rain comes in drenching downpours or incessant drizzles, thunder rumbles through the night, puddles accumulate in the roads and paths. The greyness of the sky and the dampness of the earth leads to a heaviness of spirit. We have also been in a marathon summer of events, visitors, opening the new hospital, patient volume increasing, new grants approved, interns, discipleship, prayer, vision for new fields . . . In other words it has been a lot of work and our tiredness of heart matches the weather a bit. Though we’re thankful for amazing victories (like the water project opening, or the generous response to our nutrition infant diaconal fund need) we are slogging through the mud at this point.

So when the sun slipped under the clouds at dusk on Thursday as we made our pizza, and illuminated a rainbow over our house, we had a small taste of Noah’s feelings. There is a promise, there is hope. This rain won’t destroy us, these trials won’t overcome us. In the midst of cloud there is beauty and color.

We gathered yesterday to pray for Sudan as a new field, which I will be visiting next week with some of our team. My heart is drizzly with the anticipation of the different directions our team will head, as we launch some members towards new places while a core of us stay behind to press on here. That is our goal, that is our vision, but it still is painful. No one is leaving very soon (well, except Bethany!!), but we know it is coming. As we prayed though, the Spirit reminded me that pilgrimage is not wandering, pilgrimage has a destination. We are all heading towards the same place, even if one path goes through Sudan, and another through America, or Bundibugyo, or Congo, or Kampala . . . . We are not heading apart but ultimately back together, a converging point.

Somehow the rainbow symbolizes that too, perhaps those ethereal colors placed high enough in the sky for many to see, a common and glorious destination.

August 2007 Prayer Letter Available!

Our latest prayer letter is now available for downloading...
See the right sidebar for "Downloadable Prayer Letters" (in pdf) format.
For those of you on the snail mail list, you will eventually receive it...but this is the only place you can get it with pictures in living color!