rotating header

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

17 April

15 years ago today, my sister gave birth to her third child and second son.  We were thousands of miles away, and missed the fun.  7 years ago today, a few minutes after midnight, my Dad died.  That time we were only a few feet away.

Family is like that, full of milestones of joy and grief, events we only experience by letters and photos, and others that we agonize through in real time.  In my experience, it's harder to miss the grief milestones than the joy ones.  But both are losses that take a long slow toll over time.

12 days ago, we were in Virginia with my Mom, less than 24 hours from departure, as she turned 77.  This time we were there.  And it was fun.  We took her to a lovely French country restaurant, legendary in the area, the kind of place you only go a handful of times in your life.  She had not been in two decades.  This being our season of paring down and packing up, Julia and I had rather limited wardrobe choices for such an occasion.  So at the last minute we delved into a closet of clothes my mom was keeping for memories.  Julia wore the outfit my mom had donned to leave her own wedding reception 55 years ago.  I wore a black lace party dress she had for sorority functions around the same era.

We all miss my Dad even more in this time of transition and selling.  The home they established over four decades will officially go on the market in the next two days.  We wish he could have been the host of the 77th Birthday, and the 15th.  But tonight we remember only gratefulness for the way he lived and loved us all.

No comments: