D-Day minus 3

The nice thing about a blog: no one HAS to read this. So we can mourn and treasure and examine every moment of our departure, and you can choose to listen to it, or not, and we don't need to know. . . and some of you can wake up in the night moved to prayer, and rescue us (thanks Mrs. D!). Helpful all around.

Julia has been communing with her cows, a way of saying goodbye, as she strokes their noses and they nuzzle up against her.

Jack has been reading Redwall and hanging out with his dog.

Yesterday CSB let out for midterm. Some of Julia's friends from the football team came to visit, play a game, take a snap, give a hug and a homemade friendship bracelet. Sweet.

Our boys sat on the porch and we reminisced. These are the people it is hardest to leave. Their presence is a beauty and a wound. Gracious letters to every member of our family which we will keep and treasure.

Last day of rounds felt very normal. Keep praying for Assusi whom God seems to be giving vision and strength for the tasks ahead, and Biguye who had taken on the task of fixing the broken ward door hinges himself . . . a symbol that we won't be solving those kind of problems anymore. Hauled a sack of years of stuffed animals into the Pediatric ward store, but could not bear to be the one to hand them out to the kids on the ward, they are like familiar little family members being sent into foster care. Will have to be done when I'm gone.

Heavy-hearted through team meeting, pizza, and a dance party. Tried to make my feet move with some joy, but gave up when Aidan welcomed my lap. Letting go.

Moment of panic when we checked on our Monday departure flight time, and in spite of an email a month ago telling us we were confirmed the flight had not made it into their scheduling books. Frantic phone calls and gracious MAF pilots and we're set again.

Torn hearts too, as Caleb tries to take exams from the infirmary where he's having the same high-fever flu Luke just survived, and Luke is getting information about his residential college placement at Yale, simultaneous worlds which we need to inhabit emotionally while we say goodbyes here.

To end the day, the bike Julia's been riding (an old one of the boys') was stolen last night during team meeting/pizza time. Harsh reality, that for many we are merely an opportunity for enrichment.

Woke this morning remembering what I'm preaching to others: God goes with us.